Posted on

Binitay: Journey of a Filipino Adoptee Trailer

Here is the official trailer of my documentary.  The official full showing will be on Sunday, March 16th, 2014 at the Philippine American Community Center of Michigan (PACCM).  I invite you all to attend the showing and how the cultural communities have helped me come in terms with my identity as a transracial adoptee.  

For those who many not understand why I created this, this project was manifested from the time I was a pre-adolescent.  During that time, fellow classmates would find out that my parents happen to be white Caucasian, while I am a Filipino.  So I told them how I was adopted and so time and time again, questions would arise from classmates asking if I ever knew my real biological parents or family.  Other questions for example were: “Do you know how to speak Filipino?  Have you been back to the Philippines?  Were you born there?  Are you full Filipino?  Are you sure?  Do you know anything about the culture?”  And so on.

So because of those constant questions, experiences of outsiderness, and a growing eagerness to find out more about the man in the mirror, it finally had led to eventually opening up my case study papers for the first time.  I read those papers and had felt a cycle of anger, forgiveness, and understanding as I learned more about my homeland.  After being able to tell my story, others have told me I should document it.  So here it is, the preview to my documentary.

_________

I invite you to join me on the rest of this journey to reach back as I move forward.

–> Visit my Kickstarter campaign at http://kck.st/filipinoadoptee

–> Join our Facebook community at http://www.facebook.com/binitaydocumentary

_________

 

Posted on

“Araw-Araw” Day by Day Daily Grind

I’ve been on hiatus with keeping up with this blog but life has continued on with compiling the last pieces of footage back here in Michigan to complete my documentary.  Life also has kept going on as for work, organizing the Filipino Youth Initiative, and the Basic Filipino Language classes, as well as being the current Youth Chair for Council of Asian Pacific Americans of Michigan.

_DSC5489 

Even though life continues to move forward, a part of my soul seems suspended within a dimension of time and thought trying to unravel everything.  Often I refer to this as a ball of yarn since everything is interconnected one way or another.  Also, It is too easy to say that “I am James Beni Wilson”.  My identity has a much deeper history than that and encompasses other peoples’ lives who I value now as well.  No one is a just a third party.  They are very much a part of the large design of life somehow.  Everything happens for a reason whether we understand those reasons or not.  Every turning point that has opened doors to me in challenging my own identity, I have been given these blessed opportunities to say these prepared me for this journey back to the Philippines to find the truth.  Without these opportunities and if I have not been able to come in contact with countless people who I have come across in this journey, I may not have the tools that they gave me to understand everything and to accept what is.

I’ve asked a few people if I have changed since this trip.  They’ve said that I seem happier.  Knowing details has helped me know  where I came from to move forward.  Will it be like this for everyone?  I cannot answer that for them.

Finding out that she is no longer with us was difficult.  The first few nights being back from the Philippines did result in tear drenched pillows.  Not only that it’s hard knowing that she passed, but also knowing that I was not abandoned.  Finding a way to communicate my/our story without bringing any disrespect won’t be tricky but will be taken in account.  

Coming in late January, my journey.  

_________

I invite you to join me on the rest of this journey to reach back as I move forward.

–> Visit my Kickstarter campaign at http://kck.st/filipinoadoptee

–> Join our Facebook community at http://www.facebook.com/binitaydocumentary

_________

Posted on

Blood, Confidentiality & Respect

 

Out of respect for my kababáyan (fellow Filipinos), barángay (municipal town), and lastly, kapamílya (biological relatives), the blog documentations as well as the film release will keep certain information kept confidential.

This will be the challenge of the film but also a learning experience of when one culture meets and learns about another.  Even though I have found many missing pieces of my puzzle, some however are incomplete and may remain that way, and I am ok with that.  But I do know that after this trip, I have a stronger sense of self and where I came from.

Anyways, welcome to my backyard!

Barrio Mabuli
Barrio Mabuli

 

_________

I invite you to join me on the rest of this journey to reach back as I move forward.

–> Visit my Kickstarter campaign at http://kck.st/filipinoadoptee

–> Join our Facebook community at http://www.facebook.com/binitaydocumentary

_________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted on

Foiled Plans & Flight Plan

Flight Plan
Flight Plan

With less than a day to leave on my trip it has not sunk in…

Several times since I was 18 I always wanted to go back to the Philippines and search for both my foster family and my birth family.  It would constantly fall through.  I’d be invited by people to be accompanied by them when they go on vacation but I don’t blame them that they didn’t tell they were going.  It’s their vacation.  My trip is more personal.  I’m beyond fortunate to be given this opportunity to not only reconnect with my foster family but also do this biological family search.  Thankfully, I’ll be able to document this experience as well.

It is the most difficult time right now for me to fathom that I’ll be going back.  It has not totally sunk and set in that I’ll be seeing my ‘birth place’.  It hasn’t really hit me that I’ll be seeing these foster family relatives and experiencing the Philippines.  Lastly, it has not ht me that I’ll be making this search for self real.

I feel as if that all of this has been postponed for a reason. Things had to happen within a series of events first before I could make this happen.  This would not have happened without your understanding and support.

_________

I invite you to join me on the rest of this journey to reach back as I move forward.

–> Visit my Kickstarter campaign at http://kck.st/filipinoadoptee

–> Join our Facebook community at http://www.facebook.com/binitaydocumentary

_________

 

 

Posted on

Sulat. (to write)

My travel journal.
My travel journal.

This was a gift from a close friend of mine.  I’m thankful she bought this for me.  I’m planning on documenting anything that first comes to mind and whatever topics they may be.  Hopefully extending my thoughts through a medium of ink and paper will unravel the ball of yarn in my head and sort out every concious and subconscious spark.  I hope to include a majority if not all of these things in my documentary if they pertain to what I will be communicating and the journey that unfolds before me.

 

_________

I invite you to join me on the rest of this journey to reach back as I move forward.

–> Visit my Kickstarter campaign at http://kck.st/filipinoadoptee

–> Join our Facebook community at http://www.facebook.com/binitaydocumentary

_________