27th Anniversary

It’s been 5 years since my last post.  I was more active on my personal account on facebook until it was disabled.

Today (Good Friday) — or this weekend of Holy Week marks my twenty seventh anniversary of being brought to the United States.

Yes, my adoptive parents and me are well aware that Lent and Holy Week changes every year.  This however doesn’t change the lasting impact of the historical moment for all of us where my adoptive mother went to the Philippines during Holy Week of 1993 and came to the Philippines to finally meet me.

So much has happened that I cannot lump into one post today to bring you all up to date since my last post in 2013.

This film has been low-key shown in many spaces.  The films have mostly been open between academic circles for higher education and I hope to show them in certain classes such as Sociology for secondary education .

I have given the rights of the Department of Social Welfare and Development to screen the film, “BINITAY: Journey of a Filipino Adoptee”, for their adoption training department in order for a better understanding of transnational and transracial adoption.  However, I criticize and see that they find my transnational/racial adoption as a success story built upon their backs when there were many struggles that have been endured without their aid and guidance to my adoptive parents.  Lastly, I’ve learned some themes such as for transracial adoption, in order for opportunity to be granted, the sacrifice can be a cultural death (birth culture).

In recent news, obviously a novel corona virus (covid-19) has affected the world globally.  My ever changing self perception of what it means to be a transracial and transnational adoptee is in constant flux due to living here in America and although to some people I do not appear to look Asian, I still have a watchful eye for myself and others whom may face violence from others due to xenophobia.  With an unnamed family member, combating their usage of saying the word #ChineseVirus and their unjust perception on immigration , I instead just put them into perspective how America is almost like a centralized place for a globalized economic hub and how diversity and multiculturalism is the paramount of America’s “exceptionalism”; however, I do not use those exact words and just frame it to stop their xenophobia and let their perception go outside of the box.

Negative rhetoric from the media of course is pervasive for those who give into scapegoating other racial backgrounds.  With any epidemic worldwide this is what we the human race needs to transcend for our survival.

Diary Entry [Friday. 6 , 2013]

It hurts.  It still hurts thinking about how a complete stranger, my biological mother, has passed away.  It was pretty recent.  She passed away on April 23rd, 2013.  They were right that there will be great change this year.

A few nights ago, my emotions had caught up with me.  I uncontrollably was crying myself to sleep at night.  It hurts that my [biological] mother had passed away right before my trip to the Philippines.  It also hurts thinking of how people [in my hometown village] knew exactly who I was in the barrio because I look like my mother.

My adoptive mother thinks that my biological mother after passing away helped make this trip happen for me. [In a Universal “Law of Attraction” type of trigger]

It’s strange.  I feel her presence even since I came home.

 

__

I invite you to join me on the rest of this journey to reach back as I move forward.

–> Visit my Indiegogo campaign at https://igg.me/at/OnceUponAnOchia-/x

–> Follow me on twitter at https://twitter.com/binitaydoc

–> Join our Facebook community at http://www.facebook.com/binitaydocumentary

Losing my mother tongue.

I remember the first few moments attending the Philippine American Community Center of Michigan (PACCM). There were many different languages of the Philippines being spoken back and forth, sounds and phrases that were familiar and alien to me as well. It was when I heard someone speaking out of the sea of other languages in the crowd had entranced me to this forgotten language that was once mine and that hearing the Cebuano or Bisaya language once again was eerily nostalgic.

It is documenting the loss in cultural and ethnic identity, and currently where I find these moments past, present and future moments most precious to keep and capture of how I’ve come to be seen and/or accepted as a member of my biological family in the Philippines very crucial and important.

Join me in my journey and let’s paint this picture together of reunion and reconciliation.

__

I invite you to join me on the rest of this journey to reach back as I move forward.

–> Visit my Indiegogo campaign at https://igg.me/at/OnceUponAnOchia-/x

–> Follow me on twitter at https://twitter.com/binitaydoc

–> Join our Facebook community at http://www.facebook.com/binitaydocumentary

The Centipede

In the past two trips to the Philippines that I made in 2013 and 2015, before I made the journey to the motherland I have encountered or have been visited by a centipede that would come across my path.  It was this Monday morning that we have met again.

“Lane Wilcken explains that the segments of the centipede’s legs represent the chain of ancestors extending back in time,  with each pair of legs representing a paternal and maternal line.  The centipede suggests the continuity of life and responsibility of perpetuating lineage.” (p.84, Apostal)

Although I may not be of Kalinga descent; as far as I know, I’ve found this as a prelude symbol of my journey.

Centipede Drawing

Out of coincidence or superstition, this may be some sort of sign for my past trips and my upcoming trip as I continue to document the next segment of my journey of as a Filipino adoptee, or what I call a “FilAmpon” –   A play on the words Filpino American and the Filipino word “ampon,” which translates to adoption.

Join me on my journey as I learn more about my biological family and our collective narrative of where I came from at my latest film project, “Once Upon An Ochia”.

______

I invite you to join me on the rest of this journey to reach back as I move forward.

–> Visit my Indiegogo campaign at https://igg.me/at/OnceUponAnOchia-/x

–> Follow me on twitter at https://twitter.com/binitaydoc

–> Join our Facebook community at http://www.facebook.com/binitaydocumentary

 _________

Apostol, Virgil Mayor. “Chapter Two: Shamanic and Spiritual Practices and Beliefs.” Way of the Ancient Healer: Sacred Teachings from the Philippine Ancestral Traditions. Berkeley, CA: North Atlantic, 2010. 84. Print.

By unknown, published by Harper & Brothers of New York, written by Thomas Wallace Know (1835-1896) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

The aftermath of the biological family reunion – where does an adoptee go from here? How does one balance two families? These are some of the questions that James Beni Wilson will attempt to answer in his next film project, Once Upon An Ochia.

There are not many documentaries that highlight the ongoing relationship of an adoptee after reuniting with their biological family. I will be will be mapping out a collective narrative focusing on the inter-cultural interactions between my families and myself. It will also include genealogy work of putting together a family tree and capturing the living oral history. This film is dedicated to adoptees, specifically trans-racial or trans-national adoptees, who are finding their way building and balancing new and old relationships, how it may impact one’s identity; to bring you a glimpse of what it may be like after post-reunion of an adoptee “finding their roots.

Please help me reach my goal in fundraising for my latest documentary film here!  Even if you don’t donate, that’s fine as long as you help me share my indiegogo campaign I’ll be very grateful!

______

I invite you to join me on the rest of this journey to reach back as I move forward.

–> Visit my Indiegogo campaign at https://igg.me/at/OnceUponAnOchia-/x

–> Follow me on twitter at https://twitter.com/binitaydoc

–> Join our Facebook community at http://www.facebook.com/binitaydocumentary